A \ B \ C \ D \ E \ F \ G \ H \ I \ J \ K \ L \ M \ N \ O \ P \ R \ S \ T \ U \ V \ W \Z

Jorrocks' Jaunts and Jollities by Robert Smith Surtees

R >> Robert Smith Surtees >> Jorrocks\' Jaunts and Jollities




"Let Grace alone," said the younger of the boatmen, seeing my affliction
at the lamentable catastrophe, "if there be but a spark of life in the
gentleman, she'll bring him round--many's the drowning man--aye, and
wounded one, too--that's been brought in here during the stormy nights,
and after fights with the coast-guard--that she's recovered."

Hot bottles, and hot flannels, and hot bricks were all applied, but in
vain; and when I saw hot brandy, too, fail of having the desired effect,
I gave my friend up as lost, and left the hut to vent my grief in the
open air. Grace was more sanguine and persevering, and when I returned,
after a half-hour's absence, I could distinctly feel a returning pulse.
Still, he gave no symptoms of animation, and it might only be the effect
produced by the applications--as he remained in the same state for
several hours. Fresh wood was added to the fire, and the boatmen having
returned to their vessel, Grace and I proceeded to keep watch during
the night, or until the arrival of a doctor. The poor old body, to whom
scenes such as this were matter of frequent occurrence, seemed to think
nothing of it, and proceeded to relate some of the wonderful escapes and
recoveries she had witnessed, in the course of which she dropped many
a sigh to the memory of some of her friends--the bold smugglers. There
were no such "braw lads" now as formerly, she said, and were it not that
"she was past eighty, and might as weel die in one place as anither,
she wad gang back to the bonny blue hulls (hills) of her ain canny
Scotland."

In the middle of one of her long stories I thought I perceived a
movement of the bedclothes, and, going to look, I found a considerable
increase in the quickness of pulsation, and also a generous sort of glow
upon the skin. "An' ded I no tell ye I wad recover him?" said she, with
a triumphant look. "Afore twa mair hours are o'er he'll spak to ye." "I
hope so, I'm sure," said I, still almost doubting her. "Oh, trust to
me," said she, "he'll come about--I've seen mony a chiel in a mickle
worse state nor him recovered. Pray, is the ould gintleman your father
or your grandfather?"

_Yorkshireman._ Why, I can't say that he's either exactly--but he's
always been as good as a grandmother to me, I know.

Grace was right. About three o'clock in the morning a sort of revulsion
of nature took place, and after having lain insensible, and to all
appearance lifeless, all that time, he suddenly began to move. Casting
his eye wildly around, he seemed lost in amazement. He muttered
something, but what it was I could not catch.

"Lush-crib again, by Jove!" were the first words he articulated, and
then, appearing to recollect himself, he added, "Oh, I forgot, I'm
drowned--well drowned, too--can't be help'd, however--wasn't born to be
hanged--and that seems clear." Thus he kept muttering and mumbling for
an hour, until old Grace thinking him so far recovered as to remove all
danger from sudden surprise, allowed me to take her seat at the bedside.
He looked at me long and intensely, but the light was not sufficiently
strong to enable him to make out who I was.

"Jorrocks!" at length said I, taking him by the hand, "how are you, my
old boy?" He started at the sound of his name. "Jorrocks," said he,
"who's that?" "Why, the Yorkshireman; you surely have not forgotten your
old friend and companion in a hundred fights!"

_Jorrocks._ Oh, Mr. York, it's you, is it? Much obliged by your
inquiries, but I'm drowned.

_Yorkshireman._ Aye, but you are coming round, you'll be better before
long.

_Jorrocks._ Never! Don't try to gammon me. You know as well as I do that
I'm drowned, and a drowned man never recovers. No, no, it's all up with
me, I feel. Set down, however, while I say a few words to you. You're a
good fellow, and I've remembered you in my will, which you'll find in
the strong port-wine-bin, along with nine pounds secret service money.
I hopes you'll think the legacy a fat one. I meant it as such. If you
marry Belinda, I have left you a third of my fourth in the tea trade.
Always said you were cut out for a grocer. Let Tat sell my stud. An
excellent man, Tat--proudish perhaps--at least, he never inwites me to
none of his dinners--but still a werry good man. Let him sell them, I
say, and mind give Snapdragon a charge or two of shot before he goes
to the 'ammer, to prevent his roaring. Put up a plain monument to my
memory--black or white marble, whichever's cheapest--but mind, no Cupids
or seraphums, or none of those sort of things--quite plain--with just
this upon it--_Hic jacet Jorrocks._ And now I'll give you a bit of news.
Neptune has appointed me huntsman to his pack of haddocks. Have two
dolphins for my own riding, and a young lobster to look after them.
Lord Farebrother whips in to me--he rides a turtle. "And now, my good
friend," said he, grasping my hands with redoubled energy, "do you think
you could accomplish me a rump-steak and oyster sauce?--also a pot of
stout?--but, mind, blow the froth off the top, for it's bad for the
kidneys!"


THE END

Copyright (c) 2007. bestextbooks.com. All rights reserved.

Maksim Gorky - "Twenty six and One and Other Stories"

Various - "Blackwood's Edinburgh Magazine Vol. 54, No. 333, July 1843"

James Russell Lowell - "The Function Of The Poet And Other Essays"

Captain Quincy Allen - "The Outdoor Chums After Big Game"