Military Memoirs of Capt. George Carleton by Daniel Defoe

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It was upon this Account, that, as formerly, he treated the Ladies with
Balls, and to pursue the Dons in their own Humour, order'd a _Tawridore_
or _Bull-Feast_. In _Spain_ no sort of public Diversions are esteemed
equal with this. But the Bulls provided at _Valencia_, not being of the
right Breed, nor ever initiated in the Mysteries, did not acquit
themselves at all masterly; and consequently, did not give the
Diversion, or Satisfaction expected. For which Reason I shall omit
giving a Description of this Bull-Feast; and desire my Reader to suspend
his Curiosity till I come to some, which, in the _Spanish_ Sense, were
much more entertaining; that is, attended with much greater Hazards and
Danger.

But though I have said, the Gallantries of the General were mostly
political at least very inoffensive; yet there happen'd about this Time,
and in this Place, a piece of Gallantry, that gave the Earl a vast deal
of Offence and Vexation; as a Matter, that in its Consequences might
have been fatal to the Interest of King _Charles_, if not to the
_English_ Nation in general; and which I the rather relate, in that it
may be of use to young Officers, and others; pointing out to them the
Danger, not to say Folly, of inadvertent and precipitate Engagements,
under unruly Passions.

I have said before, that _Valencia_ is famous for fine Women. It indeed
abounds in them; and among those, are great Numbers of Courtezans not
inferior in Beauty to any. Nevertheless, two of our _English_ Officers,
not caring for the common Road, however safe, resolv'd to launch into
the deeper Seas, though attended with much greater Danger. Amours, the
common Failing of that fair City, was the Occasion of this Accident, and
two Nuns the Objects. It is customary in that Country for young People
in an Evening to resort to the Grates of the Nunneries, there to divert
themselves, and the Nuns, with a little pleasant and inoffensive
Chit-chat. For though I have heard some relate a World of nauseous
Passages at such Conversations, I must declare, that I never saw, or
heard any Thing unseemly; and therefore whenever I have heard any such
from such Fabulists, I never so much wrong'd my Judgment as to afford
them Credit.

Our two Officers were very assiduous at the Grates of a Nunnery in this
Place; and having there pitch'd upon two Nuns, prosecuted their Amours
with such Vigour, that, in a little time, they had made a very great
Progress in their Affections, without in the least considering the
Dangers that must attend themselves and the Fair; they had exchang'd
Vows, and prevail'd upon the weaker Vessels to endeavour to get out to
their Lovers. To effect which, soon after, a Plot was lay'd; the Means,
the Hour, and every thing agreed upon.

It is the Custom of that Nunnery, as of many others, for the Nuns to
take their weekly Courses in keeping the Keys of all the Doors. The two
Love-sick Ladies giving Notice to their Lovers at the Grate, that one of
their Turns was come, the Night and Hour was appointed, which the
Officers punctually observing, carry'd off their Prey without either
Difficulty or Interruption.

But next Morning, when the Nuns were missing, what an Uproar was there
over all the City? The Ladies were both of Quality; and therefore the
Tidings were first carry'd to their Relations. They receiv'd the News
with Vows of utmost Vengeance; and, as is usual in that Country, put
themselves in Arms for that Purpose. There needed no great canvassing
for discovering who were the Aggressors: The Officers had been too
frequent, and too publick, in their Addresses, to leave any room for
question. Accordingly, they were complain'd of and sought for, but
sensible at last of their past Temerity, they endeavour'd, and with a
great deal of Difficulty perfected their Escape.

Less fortunate were the two fair Nuns; their Lovers, in their utmost
Exigence, had forsaken them; and they, poor Creatures, knew not where to
fly. Under this sad Dilemma they were taken; and, as in like Offences,
condemn'd directly to the Punishment of _immuring_. And what greater
Punishment is there on Earth than to be confin'd between four narrow
Walls, only open at the Top; and thence to be half supported with Bread
and Water, till the Offenders gradually starve to Death?

The Earl of _Peterborow_, though highly exasperated at the Proceedings
of his Officers, in compassion to the unhappy Fair, resolv'd to
interpose by all the moderate Means possible. He knew very well, that no
one Thing could so much prejudice the _Spaniard_ against him, as the
countenancing such an Action; wherefore he inveigh'd against the
Officers, at the same time that he endeavour'd to mitigate in favour of
the Ladies: But all was in vain; it was urg'd against those charitable
Intercessions, that they had broke their Vows; and in that had broke in
upon the Laws of the Nunnery and Religion; the Consequence of all which
could be nothing less than the Punishment appointed to be inflicted. And
which was the hardest of all, the nearest of their Relations most
oppos'd all his generous Mediations; and those, who according to the
common Course of Nature should have thank'd him for his Endeavours to be
instrumental in rescuing them from the impending Danger, grew more and
more enrag'd, because he oppos'd them in their Design of a cruel
Revenge.

Notwithstanding all which the Earl persever'd; and after a deal of
Labour, first got the Penalty suspended; and, soon after, by the Dint of
a very considerable Sum of Money (a most powerful Argument, which
prevails in every Country) sav'd the poor Nuns from immuring; and at
last, though with great Reluctance, he got them receiv'd again into the
Nunnery. As to the Warlike Lovers, one of them was the Year after slain
at the Battle of _Almanza_; the other is yet living, being a Brigadier
in the Army.

While the Earl of _Peterborow_ was here with his little Army of great
Hereticks, neither Priests nor People were so open in their
superstitious Fopperies, as I at other times found them. For which
Reason I will make bold, and by an Antichronism in this Place, a little
anticipate some Observations that I made some time after the Earl left
it. And as I have not often committed such a Transgression, I hope it
may be the more excusable now, and no way blemish my Memoirs, that I
break in upon the Series of my Journal.

_VALENCIA_ is a handsome City, and a Bishoprick; and is considerable not
only for the Pleasantness of its Situation and beautiful Ladies; but
(which at some certain Times, and on some Occasions, to them is more
valuable than both those put together) for being the Birth-place of
Saint _Vincent_, the Patron of the Place; and next for its being the
Place where _Santo Domingo_, the first Institutor of the _Dominican_
Order had his Education. Here, in honour of the last, is a spacious and
very splendid Convent of the _Dominicans_. Walking by which, I one Day
observ'd over the Gate, a Figure of a man in stone; and near it a Dog
with a lighted Torch in his Mouth. The Image I rightly enough took to
intend that of the Saint; but inquiring of one of the Order, at the
Gate, the Meaning of the Figures near it, he very courteously ask'd me
to walk in, and then entertain'd me with the following Relation:

When the Mother of _Santo Domingo_, said that Religious, was with Child
of that future Saint, she had a Dream which very much afflicted her. She
dreamt that she heard a Dog bark in her Belly; and inquiring (at what
Oracle is not said) the Meaning of her Dream, she was told, _That that
Child should bark out the Gospel_ (excuse the Bareness of the
Expression, it may run better in _Spanish_; tho', if I remember right,
_Erasmus_ gives it in _Latin_ much the same Turn) _which should thence
shine out like that lighted Torch_. And this is the Reason, that
wherever you see the Image of that Saint, a Dog and a lighted Torch is
in the Group.

He told me at the same time, that there had been more Popes and
Cardinals of that Order than of any, if not all the other. To confirm
which, he led me into a large Gallery, on each Side whereof he shew'd me
the Pictures of all the Popes and Cardinals that had been of that Order;
among which, I particularly took Notice of that of Cardinal _Howard_,
great Uncle to the present Duke of _Norfolk_. But after many _Encomiums_
of their Society, with which he interspers'd his Discourse, he added one
that I least valu'd it for; That the sole Care and Conduct of the
Inquisition was intrusted with them.

Finding me attentive, or not so contradictory as the _English_ Humour
generally is, he next brought me into a fair and large Cloister, round
which I took several Turns with him; and, indeed, The Place was too
delicious to tire, under a Conversation less pertinent or courteous than
that he entertain'd me with. In the Middle of the Cloister was a small
but pretty and sweet Grove of Orange and Lemon-trees; these bore Fruit
ripe and green, and Flowers, all together on one Tree; and their Fruit
was so very large and beautiful, and their Flowers so transcendently
odoriferous, that all I had ever seen of the like Kind in _England_
could comparatively pass only for Beauty in Epitome, or Nature imitated
in Wax-work. Many Flocks also of pretty little Birds, with their
chearful Notes, added not a little to my Delight. In short, in Life I
never knew or found three of my Senses at once so exquisitely gratify'd.

Not far from this, Saint _Vincent_, the Patron, as I said before, of
this City, has a Chapel dedicated to him. Once a Year they do him Honour
in a sumptuous Procession. Then are their Streets all strow'd with
Flowers, and their Houses set off with their richest Tapestries, every
one strives to excel his Neighbour in distinguishing himself by the
Honour he pays to that Saint; and he is the best Catholick, as well as
the best Citizen, in the Eye of the _religious_, who most exerts himself
on this Occasion.

The Procession begins with a Cavalcade of all the Friars of all the
Convents in and about the City. These walk two and two with folded Arms,
and Eyes cast down to the very Ground, and with the greatest outward
Appearance of Humility imaginable; nor, though the Temptation from the
fine Women that fill'd their Windows, or the rich Tapestries that
adorn'd the Balconies might be allow'd sufficient to attract, could I
observe that any one of them all ever mov'd them upwards.

After the Friars is borne, upon the Shoulders of twenty Men at least, an
Imagine of that Saint of solid Silver, large as the Life; It is plac'd
in a great Chair of Silver likewise; the Staves that bear him up, and
upon which they bear him, being of the same Metal. The whole is a most
costly and curious Piece of Workmanship, such as my Eyes never before or
since beheld.

The Magistrates follow the Image and its Supporters, dress'd in their
richest Apparel, which is always on this Day, and on this Occasion,
particularly sumptuous and distinguishing. Thus is the Image, in the
greatest Splendor, borne and accompany'd round that fine City; and at
last convey'd to the Place from whence it came: And so concludes that
annual Ceremony.

The _Valencians_, as to the Exteriors of Religion, are the most devout
of any in _Spain_, though in common Life you find them amorous, gallant,
and gay, like other People; yet on solemn Occasions there shines
out-right such a Spirit as proves them the very Bigots of Bigotry: As a
Proof of which Assertion, I will now give some Account of such
Observations, as I had time to make upon them, during two _Lent_
Seasons, while I resided there.

The Week before the _Lent_ commences, commonly known by the Name of
_Carnaval Time_, the whole City appears a perfect _Bartholomew_ Fair;
the Streets are crouded, and the Houses empty; nor is it possible to
pass along without some Gambol or Jack-pudding Trick offer'd to you;
Ink, Water, and sometimes Ordure, are sure to be hurl'd at your Face or
Cloaths; and if you appear concern'd or angry, they rejoyce at it,
pleas'd the more, the more they displease; for all other Resentment is
at that time out of Season, though at other times few in the World are
fuller of Resentment or more captious.

The younger Gentry, or Dons, to express their Gallantry, carry about
them Egg-shells, fill'd with Orange or other sweet Water, which they
cast at Ladies in their Coaches, or such other of the fair Sex as they
happen to meet in the Streets.

But after all, if you would think them extravagant to Day, as much
transgressing the Rules of common Civility, and neither regarding
Decency to one another, nor the Duty they owe to Almighty God; yet when
_Ash-Wednesday_ comes you will imagine them more unaccountable in their
Conduct, being then as much too excessive in all outwards Indications of
Humility and Repentance. Here you shall meet one, bare-footed, with a
Cross on his Shoulder, a Burden rather fit for somewhat with four Feet,
and which his poor Two are ready to sink under, yet the vain Wretch
bears and sweats, and sweats and bears, in hope of finding Merit in an
Ass's Labour.

Others you shall see naked to their Wastes, whipping themselves with
Scourges made for the Purpose, till the Blood follows every Stroke; and
no Man need be at a Loss to follow them by the very Tracks of Gore they
shed in this frentick Perambulation. Some, who from the Thickness of
their Hides, or other Impediments, have not Power by their Scourgings to
fetch Blood of themselves, are follow'd by Surgeons with their Lancets,
who at every Turn, make use of them, to evince the Extent of their
Patience and Zeal by the Smart of their Folly. While others, mingling
Amour with Devotion, take particular Care to present themselves all
macerated before the Windows of their Mistresses; and even in that
Condition, not satisfy'd with what they have barbarously done to
themselves, they have their Operators at hand, to evince their Love by
the Number of their Gashes and Wounds; imagining the more Blood they
lose, the more Love they shew, and the more they shall gain. These are
generally Devoto's of Quality; though the Tenet is universal, that he
that is most bloody is most devout.

After these Street-Exercises, these ostentatious Castigations are over,
these Self-sacrificers repair to the great Church, the bloodier the
better; there they throw themselves, in a Condition too vile for the Eye
of a Female, before the Image of the Virgin _Mary_; though I defy all
their Race of Fathers, and their infallible holy Father into the
Bargain, to produce any Authority to fit it for Belief, that she ever
delighted in such sanguinary Holocausts.

During the whole Time of _Lent_, you will see in every Street some
Priest or Frier, upon some Stall or Stool, preaching up Repentance to
the People; and with violent Blows on his Breast crying aloud, _Mia
Culpa, mia maxima Culpa_, till he extract reciprocal Returns from the
Hands of his Auditors on their own Breasts.

When _Good Friday_ is come they entertain it with the most profound Show
of Reverence and Religion, both in their Streets and in their Churches.
In the last, particularly, they have contriv'd about twelve a-Clock
suddenly to darken them, so as to render them quite gloomy. This they do
to intimate the Eclipse of the Sun, which at that time happen'd. And to
signify the Rending of the Vail of the Temple, you are struck with a
strange artificial Noise at the very same Instant.

But when _Easter_ Day appears, you find it in all Respects with them a
Day of Rejoicing; for though Abstinence from Flesh with them, who at no
time eat much, is not so great a Mortification as with those of the same
Persuasion in other Countries, who eat much more, yet there is a visible
Satisfaction darts out at their Eyes, which demonstrates their inward
Pleasure in being set free from the Confinement of Mind to the
Dissatisfaction of the Body. Every Person you now meet greets you with a
_Resurrexit Jesus_; a good Imitation of the primitive Christians, were
it the real Effect of Devotion. And all Sorts of the best Musick (which
here indeed is the best in all _Spain_) proclaim an auspicious
Valediction to the departed Season of superficial Sorrow and stupid
Superstition. But enough of this: I proceed to weightier Matters.

While we lay at _Valencia_, under the Vigilance and Care of the
indefatigable Earl, News was brought that _Alicant_ was besieg'd by
General _Gorge_ by Land, while a Squadron of Men of War batter'd it from
the Sea; from both which the Besiegers play'd their Parts so well, and
so warmly ply'd them with their Cannon, that an indifferent practicable
Breach was made in a little time.

_Mahoni_ commanded in the Place, being again receiv'd into Favour; and
clear'd as he was of those political Insinuations before intimated, he
now seem'd resolv'd to confirm his Innocence by a resolute Defence.
However, perceiving that all Preparations tended towards a Storm, and
knowing full well the Weakness of the Town, he withdrew his Garrison
into the Castle, leaving the Town to the Defence of its own Inhabitants.

Just as that was doing, the Sailors, not much skill'd in Sieges, nor at
all times capable of the coolest Consideration, with a Resolution
natural to them, storm'd the Walls to the Side of the Sea; where not
meeting with much Opposition (for the People of the Town apprehended the
least Danger there) they soon got into the Place; and, as soon as got
in, began to Plunder. This oblig'd the People, for the better Security
of themselves, to open their Gates, and seek a Refuge under one Enemy,
in opposition to the Rage of another.

General _Gorge_, as soon as he enter'd the Town, with a good deal of
seeming Lenity, put a stop to the Ravages of the Sailors; and ordered
Proclamation to be made throughout the Place, that all the Inhabitants
should immediately bring in their best Effects into the great Church for
their better Security. This was by the mistaken Populace, as readily
comply'd with; and neither Friend nor Foe at all disputing the Command,
or questioning the Integrity of the Intention; the Church was presently
crouded with Riches of all sorts and sizes. Yet after some time
remaining there, they were all taken out, and disposed of by those, that
had as little Property in 'em, as the Sailors, they were pretended to be
preserv'd from.

The Earl of _Peterborow_ upon the very first News of the Siege had left
_Valencia_, and taken Shipping for _Alicant_; where he arrived soon
after the Surrender of the Town, and that Outcry of the Goods of the
Townsmen. Upon his Arrival, _Mahoni_, who was block'd up in the Castle,
and had experienced his indefatigable Diligence, being in want of
Provisions, and without much hope of Relief, desired to capitulate. The
Earl granted him honourable Conditions, upon which he delivered up the
Castle, and _Gorge_ was made Governor.

Upon his Lordship's taking Ship at _Valencia_, I had an Opportunity of
marching with those Dragoons, which escorted him from _Castile_, who had
received Orders to march into _Murcia_. We quarter'd the first Night at
_Alcira_, a Town that the River _Segra_ almost surrounds, which renders
it capable of being made a Place of vast Strength, though now of small
Importance.

The next Night we lay at _Xativa_, a Place famous for its steadiness to
King _Charles_. General _Basset_, a _Spaniard_, being Governor; it was
besieg'd by the Forces of King _Philip_; but after a noble Resistance,
the Enemy were beat off, and the Siege raised; for which Effort, it is
supposed, that on the Retirement of King _Charles_ out of this Country,
it was depriv'd of its old Name _Xativa_, and is now called _San
Felippo_; though to this day the People thereabouts much dissallow by
their Practice, that novel Denomination.

We march'd next Morning by _Monteza_; which gives Name to the famous
Title of Knights of _Monteza_. It was at the Time that Colonel _O
Guaza_, an _Irish-man_, was Governor, besieg'd by the People of the
Country, in favour of King _Charles_; but very ineffectually, so it
never chang'd its Sovereign. That Night we quarter'd at _Fonte dalas
Figuras_, within one League of _Almanza_; where that fatal and
unfortunate Battle, which I shall give an Account of in its Place, was
fought the Year after, under the Lord _Galway_.

On our fourth days March we were oblig'd to pass _Villena_, where the
Enemy had a Garrison. A Party of _Mahoni's_ Dragoons made a part of that
Garrison, and they were commanded by Major _O. Rairk_ an _Irish_
Officer, who always carried the Reputation of a good Soldier, and a
brave Gentleman.

I had all along made it my Observation, that Captain _Matthews_, who
commanded those Dragoons, that I march'd with, was a Person of much more
Courage than Conduct; and he us'd as little Precaution here, though just
marching under the Eye of the Enemy, as he had done at other Times. As
I was become intimately acquainted with him, I rode up to him, and told
him the Danger, which, in my Opinion, attended our present March. I
pointed out to him just before _Villena_ a jutting Hill, under which we
must unavoidably pass; at the turning whereof, I was apprehensive the
Enemy might he, and either by Ambuscade or otherwise, surprize us; I
therefore intreated we might either wait the coming of our Rear Guard;
or at least march with a little more leisure and caution. But he taking
little notice of all I said, kept on his round March; seeing which, I
press'd forward my Mule, which was a very good one, and rid as fast as
her Legs could carry her, till I had got on the top of the Hill. When I
came there, I found both my Expectation, and my Apprehensions answered:
For I could very plainly discern three Squadrons of the Enemy ready
drawn up, and waiting for Us at the very winding of the Hill.

Hereupon I hastened back to the Captain with the like Speed, and told
him the Discovery I had made; who nevertheless kept on his March, and it
was with a good deal of Difficulty, that I at last prevail'd on him to
halt, till our Rear Guard of twenty Men had got up to us. But those
joining us, and a new Troop of _Spanish_ Dragoons, who had march'd
towards us that Morning, appearing in Sight; our Captain, as if he was
afraid of their rivalling him in his Glory, at the very turn of the
Hill, rode in a full Gallop, with Sword in Hand, up to the Enemy. They
stood their Ground, till we were advanc'd within two hundred Yards of
them, and then in Confusion endeavoured to retire into the Town.

They were obliged to pass over a small Bridge, too small to admit of
such a Company in so much haste; their crouding upon which obstructed
their Retreat, and left all that could not get over, to the Mercy of our
Swords, which spar'd none. However narrow as the Bridge was, Captain
_Matthews_ was resolved to venture over after the Enemy; on doing which,
the Enemy made a halt, till the People of the Town, and the very Priests
came out to their Relief with fire Arms. On so large an Appearance,
Captain _Matthews_ thought it not adviseable to make any further
Advances; so driving a very great flock of Sheep from under the Walls,
he continued his March towards _Elda_. In this Action we lost Captain
_Topham_, and three Dragoons.

I remember we were not marched very far from the Place, where this
Rencounter happen'd; when an _Irish_ Dragoon overtook the Captain, with
a civil Message from Major _O Rairk_, desiring that he would not
entertain a mean Opinion of him for the Defence that was made; since
could he have got the _Spaniards_ to have stood their Ground, he should
have given him good Reason for a better. The Captain return'd a
complimental Answer, and so march'd on. This Major _O Rairk_, or _O
Roork_, was the next Year killed at _Alkay_, being much lamented, for he
was esteemed both for his Courage and Conduct, one of the best of the
_Irish_ Officers in the _Spanish_ Service. I was likewise informed that
he was descended from one of the ancient Kings of _Ireland_; the Mother
of the honourable Colonel _Paget_, one of the Grooms of the Bedchamber
to his present Majesty, was nearly related to this Gallant Gentleman.

One remarkable Thing I saw in that Action, which affected and surprised
me; A _Scotch_ Dragoon, of but a moderate Size, with his large
basket-hilted Sword, struck off a _Spaniard's_ Head at one stroke, with
the same ease, in appearance, as a Man would do that of a Poppy.

When we came to _Elda_ (a Town much in the Interest of King _Charles_,
and famous for its fine Situation, and the largest Grapes in _Spain_)
the Inhabitants received us in a manner as handsome as it was peculiar;
all standing at their Doors with lighted Torches; which considering the
Time we enter'd was far from an unwelcome or disagreeable Sight.

The next Day several requested to be the Messengers of the Action at
_Villena_ to the Earl of _Peterborow_ at _Alicant_; but the Captain
return'd this Answer to all, that in consideration of the Share that I
might justly claim in that Day's Transactions, he could not think of
letting any other Person be the Bearer. So giving me his Letters to the
Earl, I the next Day deliver'd them to him at _Alicant_. At the
Delivery, Colonel _Killigrew_ (whose Dragoons they were) being present,
he expressed a deal of Satisfaction at the Account, and his Lordship was
pleased at the same time to appoint me sole Engineer of the Castle of
_Alicant_.

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