Memoirs of Major Alexander Ramkins (1718) by Daniel Defoe

D >> Daniel Defoe >> Memoirs of Major Alexander Ramkins (1718)

Pages:
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6

_London_ is a Place above my Description, and though I lost no Time the
six Months I remain'd there, to view what Curiosities were to be seen,
yet 'tis probable many Things worthy of Observation escaped my
Diligence. I took a particular care not to make my self Public, but
pass'd at my Lodgings under Disguise of a Merchant, yet abroad I acted
the Marquess, not to be depriv'd of the Means of introducing my self
into the best of Company. I found they were much divided in _England_ as
to the _French_ Politicks; some were of Opinion that _Lewis_ XIV was
serious in King _James_'s Cause, but these were Persons who had no
Notion of Foreign Affairs, and judg'd of Matters according to their
first Appearance; for others who had studied the Interest of Nations,
and how their Pretensions he in regard of one another, had no Notion of
the _French_ King's Sincerity, either towards King _James_, or any other
Prince he dealt with, and there is not one Instance I have mention'd in
these Memoirs, in order to demonstrate the Infatuated State of the Court
of St. _Germains_, but I heard it frequently urg'd to the same purpose,
by the most intelligent Persons, as well Friends as Enemies to King
_James_. While I was diverting my self at _London_, I receiv'd a Letter
from _Paris_, that there was a Lieutenant Collonel's Place vacant, which
I might easily be promoted to in Case I wou'd be at the trouble to, make
use of what Interest I might reasonably Command. But I quickly
understood, that by my Interest was meant my Money, so employing my
_Amsterdam_ Stock that way, I might very probably by a _French_ Piece of
Civility, live to want both my Money and a Commission. I return'd a
thousand Thanks to my Friends for their Diligence in my Absence, but
told 'em, I had rather wait till another War broke out, and their would
be more choice of Promotions, and I might please my self, because I was
somewhat curious what Regiment I engag'd in.

It was a tedious Journey to go into _Scotland_ by Land, otherwise I was
very much disposed to see my own Country once more, and apprehending
besides, there might be some Danger upon account of being engaged in the
_French_ Service during this late War. I laid these Thoughts aside, and
contented my self with making a small Tour Twenty or Thirty Miles
distance from _London_, in which Progrination I saw _Windsor_,
_Greenwich_, _Hampton-Court_, and some other Places of Note. But in one
of these Jaunts, I had like to have paid very dear for my Curiosity. The
Neighbourhood of _London_ is much infested with Highwaymen, and if a
Gentleman rides not with Pistols, 'tis very probable he will be
attack'd. Unacquainted with these Customs, the Day I went to _Windsor_,
I had in Company with me an _Irish_ Gentleman; we made use of nothing
but common Hacks, nor had any other Arms but our Swords; about the
middle of _Honslow Heath_ we met two Gentlemen well mounted, who pass'd
by us unsuspected, but turning suddenly upon us again, with each of 'em
a small Pistol cock'd, they very civilly demanded our Money. Gentlemen,
said I, I am a Stranger; no Gentlemen said they, come quickly deliver
what you have, we are in a publick Road, and can't stand arguing; but
finding us a little Dilatory, they whip'd the Bridles from our Horfes,
cut our Garths, and so dismounted us; and so I and my Companion were
very dexterously strip'd of what they found in our Pockets, which was
all I had about me, but my Friend reserv'd two or three Guineas in his
Fob. When they had finish'd their Business, they gallop'd different ways
cross the Heath, and left us like a couple of Asses, to drive our Horses
to the next Town, and carry the Saddles under our Arms; but by the
Invention of our Garters, and some other such like Tackle, we halter'd
our Steeds till we cou'd refit our selves better. What we lost was but
a Trifle, and 'twas done in so small a space of Time, that appear'd like
a Dream or passing Thought. It was happy either for us or them, that
this happen'd in the Morning when our Heads were cool, for had they
attack'd us when warm'd up with good Liquor, I believe I should have had
little regard to those Pop-guns they threatened us with. When we came to
the next Town, and gave the People an account of our Disaster; the
Landlord of the Inn ask'd us, if we had ever been upon that Road before,
and we inform'd him this was the first time, then said I have Authority
to enroll you as Freemen upon the small Fee of each a Bottle of Wine,
and this I take to be no Imposition, because I am plac'd here in a
convenient Part of the Country to advance a small sum to such as are
robb'd of all they have, and cannot pursue their Journey; so Gentlemen,
if that be your Condition, I have a couple of Guineas ready for you,
which I will lend upon Honour, but in Case it be not a clean Robbery,
what you have conceal'd from the Diligent Highwaymen is the Landlord's
Fee as far as each a Bottle of Wine. This Merry Landlord I thought was
very conveniently posted to divert People after their Misfortunes, we
never went about to examine him, whether his Demand was customary, or
only a Piece of shire Wit, and an extemporary Instance of his prolifick
Genius, but sat down, and made our selves most immoderately drunk. The
Landlord discanted very copiously upon the ancient and modern Practise
of Robbing upon the Road, and seem'd very much inclin'd to lessen the
Crime. Formerly, said he, no Body robb'd upon the Road but base
scoundrel Fellows; but now 'tis become a Gentleman-like Employment, and
young Brothers of very good Families are not asham'd to spend their time
that way; besides the Practise is very much refin'd as to the manner,
there's no Fighting or Hectoring during the Performance, but these
Gentlemen approach you decently and submissive, with their Hat in their
Hand to know your Pleasure, and what you can well afford to support them
in that Dignity they live in: 'Tis true, says he, they often for Form
sake have a Pistol in their Hand, which is part of their riding
Furniture; but that is only in the Nature of a Petition, to let you know
they are Orphans of Providence just fallen under your Protection. In a
Word, demanding Money upon the Road, is now so agreeably perform'd,
that 'tis much the same with asking an Alms. The poor Beggar wou'd rob
you if he durst, and the Gentleman Beggar will not rob you if you will
but give a decent Alms suitable to his Quality. I thought my time so
well spent to hear this Landlord plead in favour of Padding, that I told
my Companion I had often known the time that I wou'd have willingly have
parted with more Money than I was strip'd of upon the Heath, to have
some Melancholly Thoughts driven away by such a merry Companion.

The Time drawing near that I prescribed to my self to remain in
_England_, we were now advis'd to return by the short Sea, which we
perform'd without any Let or remarkable Accident. I have observ'd
towards the beginning of these Memoirs, that the War begun in 1688, was
undertaken in Defence of Cardinal _Fastenberg_ to the Electorate of
_Cologn_; the next War was for the Mornarchy of _Spain_, but the
Restoration of King _James_ was always a material Article, and a very
useful Circumstance of the War. I need not acquaint the Reader how
_France_ was reduced in this last bloody War, her best Troops ruin'd,
incapable to win a Battle, every Campaign carry'd two or three of their
best Towns, the Nation dispirited, and Credit sunk, and nothing but a
dismal Scene of Poverty and Misery: And yet in the midst of all this
Misery, (as the _Spanish_ Beggars are said to strut about in their Cloak
and Bilboes at their Side) so this Gasping Monarch had the Assurance not
only to talk of making a Descent, but actually equipp'd a small nimble
Fleet with a Body of Men, and persuaded the Pretender to go upon the
foolish Errand, as if he you'd have any prospect of Conquering the Three
Kingdoms, who was in danger every Moment of having his Capital Sack'd
and himself turn'd out of his Throne. Cou'd there be a more Romantick
Undertaking, or more unintelligible in all its Circumstances, than the
Pretender's Descent upon _Scotland_? The deluded Youth was carry'd to
the Coast of _Scotland_, but upon what Design, is a Secret to this Day.
He was made to believe at his departure from _Dunkirk_, that _Scotland_
was dissatisfy'd to a Man upon account of the Union, and that it wou'd
be an easie matter to Conquer _England_ by putting himself at the Head
of a _Scotch_ Army; but when he desired to be landed to put the Project
in Execution, the _French_ General told him, he had Orders from his
great Master, that there should be no Landing. Now whether this was part
of the old Game, and only in Order to make a Diversion, or to surprize
_Edinburgh_ Castle, where most of the Specie of _Scotland_ was said to
be lodg'd at that time, is various alledg'd by Men of Speculation. That
there was no appearance of succeeding in the main, is pretty plain from
many Circumstances. _England_ with their Allies at that Time were in a
Capacity to spare 50000 Men, against which a few poor scrambling
_Highland_ Foot, wou'd but have made a very bad Resistance. I am not
willing to think _France_ would send Princes a Pilfering, or that the
Pretender was design'd to steal the Money out of _Edinburgh_ Castle, a
Stratagem much more decently committed to some Partisan, or three or
four _Dunkirk_ Privateers. So I think it more suitable to the Prudence,
and for the Honour of the _French_ Court, to mention this design'd
Descent only as a Diversion to amuse and employ the _British_ Troops at
Home, that they might not annoy the Enemy in _Flanders_. But how this
Affair will be reconcil'd to that Affection and Friendship _Lewis_ XIV.
seem'd to have at that time for the Pretender, I am at a loss, with the
rest of Mankind, to account for, since it was exposing him to the
greatest of hazards for a Trifle, and throwing up the Cause at once, had
he fallen into the Hands of his Enemies, and 'tis not the least Miracle
of his Life that he escap'd them. I was invited to have gone abroad with
the Pretender upon this Expedition, being than Free, but the Project
appear'd to me so full of Inconsistencies, I have frequently since
enlarg'd upon my own Politicks and Foresight in that Affair.

Thus much I must say for the Jacobite Party, never were Men more baffled
and rallied oftner upon Projects or Hopes, but the unwholesome Diet
never turn into the Substance, but infects the Body with peccant
Humours, which now and then are discharg'd by Phlegbotomy, and then they
turn to a Gangreen by Amputation. Jacobitism (I speak of it in relation
to the strong Hopes they have of succeeding by a _French_ Power) is an
uncurable Distemper. I have often wonder'd to hear Persons, otherwise of
great Penetration and Sense, grow constantly Delirious upon this Topick.
The Wagers that have been lost upon that very Prospect wou'd have
purchas'd him a little Kingdom. Time has open'd a great many People's
Eyes; but there is a set of Men who are enslaved to the _French_
Projects, and so far infatuated, that nothing can cure them. If fooling
him with sham Descents, neglecting all Opportunities of assisting, if
banishing him, excluding him by solemn Articles, will not satisfy 'em as
to this Particular, 'tis my Opinion they wou'd not be convinc'd, if they
should see _France_ chaffering for his Head, and finish the Twenty Eight
Years old Politicks with 100000_l_. being what is set upon it. There is
no extraordinary difference between disposing of another Man's Right,
and disposing of his Person. There was a Time when _France_ gloried in
the Ostentatious Title of being the Assylum of distress'd Monarchs, and
I remember I was once dispos'd to have almost deify'd their Monarch upon
that Score; but when I took the Frame of his Politics, and examin'd
every Wheel and Spring by which they moved, I rescued my self from the
Prejudices I had been nurs'd up in; and though I always pursu'd the same
End, yet I was a constant Enemy to their Method, which I was convinc'd
were all directed another Way, and that a Restoration upon a _French_
Footing was a Chimerical Project, and that if it had taken Effect by
their Arms, _England_ must have had another Doomsday-Book, and have
suffer'd once more under an Arbitary Discipline, more dreadful than that
of _William the Conqueror_, from whom _England_ has been struggling to
retrieve her self ever since. I had formerly made a Resolution with my
self not to hearken to a Love-Intrigue, but upon a Prospect of putting
an end to such Amusements. The long time I had been out of the Army,
gave me several Opportunities to make Enquiry after a Person who was
capable of making me happy in that Respect. I took a singular Care when
any Thing was offer'd that way, to consult my Reason more than my
Passions, and had fix'd before my Eyes, the per-plex'd State I liv'd in
those Weeks I held a Correspondence with the _Spanish_ Lady. 'Tis a
dangerous practice when a Person shuts his Eyes among Precipices, and
neglects Consultation where the Choice is hazardous. There liv'd in
_Paris_ a Collonel's Widow, neither very young, nor very handsome. The
intimacy I had with her Husband, who was kill'd in _Italy_, brought me
first acquainted with her. Her discreet Carriage in a great variety of
intricate Circumstances had often Charm'd me. There was no Difficulty in
a marriage State, but she had struggled with it; a morose Husband, the
Death of an only Child, the Gripes of Poverty when her Consort was in
the Army and lavish'd away his Income, were great Tryals in which she
always Triumph'd, and wore a stoical Constancy without any Reservedness.
She had a large Pension allow'd her for Life, upon account of her
Husband's Merits, who had done great Service during the Wars. Under
these Circumstances I attack'd, rather like a Judicious than a
Passionate Lover. The Method I took with her, was quite different to
what I observ'd in pursuing my _Spanish_ Mistress. There was no Balls,
Treats, nor Serenading, we both knew the World too well, either She to
expect, or I to offer her such Entertainments. In a Word, our whole
Discourse when I visited ran upon Oeconemy and Morals. It was not long
before she understood my Meaning, and that my repeated Visits tended
towards Marriage. She alledg'd several Things to divert me from it; that
she was tired with being an Officer's Wife, which oblig'd either to a
rambling Method of Living, or to labour under great Inconveniences, and
that I, perhaps, might not make the best of Husbands, that State being a
Lottery full of Blanks. I had nothing more pertinent to alledge upon
this Occasion, than to assure her, that during my Absence in the Army
she should never be unprovided with what would make her easie, and for
being a good Husband, I gave her all the Assurances that such a Matter
was capable of, and at the same time made her the Compliment, that in
case any misunderstanding should ever happen between us, her approv'd
Conduct and Discretion would certainly declare me Guilty. In conclusion,
I put on the Trummels, and never question'd but I had made the most
prudential Choice that any Person could do; but there is something in
Woman-kind which can never be found out by Study or Reflection. 'Tis
only Experience that can School a Husband, and can give him a true Idea
of that mysterious Creature; for in less than Twelve Months my Thousand
Pounds which I had so carefully kept unbroke at _Amsterdam_ was all
dispos'd of, my Soldiers Pay being my only Subsistance for myself and
Family, my Wife reserving her own Income for Pin-mony; my Credit very
low, my Days very irksome upon many accounts, and I who had hitherto
appear'd with Assurance in Company, because of my Money-merit, was now
Neglected; for every Tradesman began to smell out my Poverty. I am of
Opinion it would do Posterity no kindness, if I shou'd discover how I
came to be ruin'd by a Prudent Wife, for no Body wou'd Credit me. If I
should advise 'em to trust no Woman living, so as to give her full Scope
upon an Opinion of her Conduct. I took my self to be as wise, upon this
Head, as any Man living. It had been my Study above twenty Years. There
is a secret Devil in every Woman, which is often Conjur'd down by a
Husband's Temper; and though many Men may pass for bad Husbands by their
Morose Carriage, 'tis less prejudicial, than that Indulgence which few
Women have Discretion to make use of. My Wife's first Husband was
represented as not very kind to her, whereas his less obliging Temper
was the Effect of his Judgment, and a touch of Skill he had in managing
a Woman, whom Caresses wou'd have exalted into Impertinence, _&c._

I would not be understood so upon this Subject, as if we lived unhappily
as to our Affections; no, we regarded each other as two inseparable
Companions, not only whose Interest it was not to be at variance, but we
really did affectionately love each other. I cou'd not so much blame her
as my self for if Children, Servants, _&c._ make a loose from their
Duty, who are chiefly to be blam'd, but such gentle and restraining
Methods did not curb 'em, but let 'em feel they had Reins in their
Hands. Thus hamper'd in Wedlock, I had nothing to give me ease but that
three parts of Mankind were in the same, if not in a much worse
Condition. However, to make our Circumstances tollerable for the future,
I perswaded my Consort to abridge her self of some superfluous Charge
which we cou'd not well bear any longer. First we disposed of our Coach,
and then our Acquaintance was reform'd of Course; by Degrees a multitude
of modish Visitors dwindled away into two or three formal Matrons, which
at last ended in a Decent Apartment in a Monastery, where she spent her
Time agreeably enough when I was in the Camp. Hitherto the main matter
which pall'd all my Joys, was the impossibility of a Restoration, which
now was much lessen'd by the concurrence of Domestick Evils, and the
Cares which attend a married State. Yet when I seriously reflected upon
the Conduct of _France_ in regard of King _James_ and the Pretender, I
have often observ'd my self to sweat and fret my self into a violent
Fever with the very Thoughts of it; but I never was so sensibly touch'd
upon this Head as after the Battle of _Malplacket_. which was follow'd
with the Surrender of several Towns, so that there was nothing but the
poor Barrier of _Landrecy_ left to save the Capital, and by Consequence,
the Kingdom of _France_. The _French_ King having now play'd away all
his Leading Cards, was now put to his Trumps. He attempts the
Treacherous and Needy Ministers with long Bags of _Louisdo'rs,_ which
were all ineffectual when his Arms cou'd do no more.

'Tis fresh in every true _Britains_ Memory, what strange Methods were
taken to bring about the Peace, which quickly after ensued. I shall only
mention as much of that Affair as is requisite to make it manifest, That
_France_ had no consideration for the Pretender's Interest during that
Treaty. The War was begun upon account of the _Spanish_ Monarchy;
_France_ was reduc'd to the last extremity, and could hold out no
longer, now the Consequence shou'd have been for _France_ to have
surrender'd up King _Philip_'s Title; but on the contrary it was secur'd
to him, and by what any one can conjecture on the Equivalent, that the
Pretender should be banish'd _France_, and herafter neither directly nor
indirectly be assisted by Force: Nay, so eagerly was _France_ bent upon
this Project of securing _Spain_, _France_, and neglecting the
Pretender, that 'tis well known he refus'd to be concern'd with those in
_England_ who were willing to restore the Pretender. I shall not pretend
to dive into the late Queen's Secrets, and how she was dispos'd that
way. 'Tis well known she was not over real for the _Hanoverian_
Succession, and that the Pretender's Interest was the only one in
competition with it. But where was the _French_ Zeal for the Pretender,
when he had the Generalissimo and his Arms, the Secretary, the
Treasurer, _&c._ all at his Devotion, and if the Pretender was not
actually restor'd at that Juncture, the Remora cou'd be no where but on
the _French_ Side, who had a longer reach in their Politicks than the
Restoration of the Pretender. They saw clearly bringing that about wou'd
create a Civil War in _England_, and be an occasion of renewing in
_Germany_; now their Business was a sudden Peace, and a quiet Possession
of _Spain_. And this is the real Spirit of Politics that govern'd the
_French_ at the Peace of _Utrecht_.

This kind of Management so disconcerted all the Pretenders Party who
then govern'd the Queen, that they flew all in Pieces, astonish'd not to
find the _French_ insist upon the Pretender's Right, as they had laid
the Design. They inform against one another, and by their unseasonable
and discontinued Animosities threw the Queen into an Agony of Fear,
which afterwards usher'd in the Agony of Death. In the mean Time
_France_ smil'd at the disorder, and hugg'd themselves in the noble
Project of having lost every Battle in that Bloody War, and yet obtain'd
what they fought for, as they had always been Victorious, whilst the
poor Pretender was so little consider'd by _France_, that tho' the
Ministry was ready to assert his Title, yet _France_ wav'd it and
subscrib'd to his Banishment, least that Affair should ruin the Main
Project.

But what I am in the next place going to observe, will make clear that
_France_ was not only unwilling to be active in assisting the Pretender,
but that they were scrupulous upon the Point, and made it their Business
to disswade him from any such Attempt. I remember I was my self in
_Lorain_, when the News of the Queen's Decease was brought the Pretender
by a Servant of _L.P._ He was no Stranger to the Interest he had just
before with the Ministry, who still were most of 'em in Power. A Ship
lay ready for him to waft him over, but he was arrested in his Journey
by the _French_ King's Orders, and threatened by _M.T._ with the
Bastile, if he did not return forthwith to _Lorain_, otherwise
considering the After-acts of the Gentlemen then in Play, he would very
probably been at St. _James_'s several Days before King _George_ left
his Palace at _Hanover_. This was so shocking a Treatment from the grand
Protector of distress'd Monarchs, that the Queen Mother then at
_Chalonois_ said this was a Key to all the mask Politics which had been
acting 27 Years, and the very Thought of it threw her into such a
Consternation, that she has never since recover'd it. I know 'tis
pretended that _Lewis_ XIV was now grown more scrupulous than formerly;
he had been in sticking to the Letter of Treaties. I shall not dispute
whether passing through the Country without assisting the Pretender,
cou'd be wrested by any Logick to be acting in his Favour. But if
_Lewis_ XIV, was scrupulous, he ought to have been so when he grew
nearer his End; for 'tis pretended by those who are willing to represent
him as always a Friend to King _James_, that in despute of the Articles
of _Utrecht_, he came into the Measures of the Duke of _Ormond_, Lord
_Bolinbroke_, the Earl of _Mar_, &c. and had not Death in the mean time
taken him off, wou'd have furnish'd 'em with all Things necessary to
have made a Head against King _George_. This, I say, is confidently
reported by _Lewis_ XIV's Admirers. But then they will have the
inconsistancy to account for, why he shou'd not scruple to raise an Army
to succour the Pretender, who a little before scrupled to let him pass'd
with a Couple of Servants, through his Country. For my own Part I am
enclin'd to believe he never was so much his Friend, but died as he
cou'd, a juggler, and that if he sign'd any thing in form of the late
Insurrection 'twas in one of his delirious Fits which were not
infrequent in his latter Years. If the Regent be a just Interpreter of
his Actions.

And to come home to the present Time, has not _France_ still the same
regardless Dispositions towards the Pretender? Are they not ready to
enter into any Engagement whatever to stand by the Articles of _Utrecht_
to the greatest nicety? I know it has been aprised about, that _France_
was in the Design against King _George_; but as the Regent reply'd very
pertinently to the Earl of _Stairs_'s Memorial. There needs no more
convincing Proof that _France_ has not been meddling, than to understand
that both in _Scotland_ and _England_, the Rebels have been destitute
both of Arms and Money? The Custom-house Officers of _Great-Britain_,
have no Authority to search _French_ Ships as they go out of their own
Ports, and had it not been an easy Matter to have sent what Arms they
pleas'd into _Scotland_? What occasion was their for the Pretender to
have sculk'd so long upon the Shoar, and stolen privately out of one of
their Havens, if the Regent had encourag'd him.

It was no Secret to me and several others above Twenty Eight Years ago,
that _France_ was never sincere in this Affair; but as their Projects
came nearer to a Conclusion, they took less care to conceal the Secret.
Till they had a Prospect of settling the _Spanish_ Monarchy in the House
of _Bourbon_, they were loud and high in their Demands concerning King
_James_; but the Hopes they conceiv'd that way, made 'em clap up a
Peace at _Reswick_, and lay King _James_'s Interest to Sleep. When the
_Spanish_ Project was ripe, and the Wealth of the _Indies_ ready to drop
into their Lap, and that they were actually to be put into Possession of
it, the Allies were amused with two Partition Treaties, and the
Pretender sacrific'd to the same Politicks at the Treaty of _Utrecht_.
Yes he was neglected, despised, banish'd out of _France_, forc'd out of
_Lorain_, a free State, threaten'd at _Avignon_, a Sanction never yet
violated, and now he and his Adherents are preparing themselves to be
thrust into the Jaws of the _Turk_, unless the Regent out of Pity
deliver him up in hope of the 100000_l_. and finish the Character of
succouring distress'd Monarchs, by being the Occasion of losing his Head
on _Tower-Hill_, rather than being Impail'd at _Constantinople_.

Pages:
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6