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The Sources and Analogues of 'A Midsummer night's Dream' by Compiled by Frank Sidgwick

C >> Compiled by Frank Sidgwick >> The Sources and Analogues of \'A Midsummer night\'s Dream\'

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[15] Professor Gollancz considers that Shakespeare had no hand in the play.

[16] Cf. I. i. 167 and IV. i. 129-30.

[17] It is perhaps fantastic to interpret too literally Arcite's song to
May--"I hope that I som grene gete may"--but, however little of their
primitive significance now remains, celebration of the rites of May is by
no means extinct. See E.K. Chambers, _The Mediaeval Stage_, I. 117: "their
object is to secure the beneficent influence of the fertilization spirit by
bringing the persons or places to be benefited into direct contact with the
physical embodiment of that spirit."

Shakespeare's apparent confusion of a May-day with a Mid-summer-night may
seem pardonable to the folk-lorist in the light of the fact that various
folk-festivals appear to take place indiscriminately on May-day or
Midsummer-day. See Chambers, _op. cit._ i. 114, 118, 126.

[18] Cf. III. ii. 331 and 401, _etc_.

[19] Cf. IV. i. 100-183.

[20] In V. i. 51.

[21] Reprinted in this book, p. 135.

[22] He might have added _Lucius the Ass_, a similar tale by Lucian of
Samosata.

[23] Reprinted in this book, p. 139.

[24] Ovid, _Met._ iv. 55, sqq.

[25] See p. 73.

[26] Addl. MS. 15227, f. 56b.

[27] _Faerie Queen,_ II. i. 6, II. x. 75.

[28] See A.W. Ward's _English Dramatic Literature_, i. 400, ii. 85.

[29] _The Marchantes Tale_, 983 (Skeat, E. 2227).

[30] A.H. Bullen's edition of Campion (1903), p. 20.

[31] _Metamorphoses_, iii. 173. Ovid, in the same work, uses "Titania" also
as an epithet of Latona (vi. 346), Pyrrha (i. 395), and Circe (xiv. 382,
438). The fact that Golding gives "Phebe" as the translation of "Titania"
in iii. 173, is a strong piece of evidence that Shakespeare sometimes at
least read his Ovid in the Latin.

[32] Ed. Brinsley Nicholson, p. 32. Book III, chap. ii. (See p. 135.)

[33] _Romeo and Juliet_, I. iv, 53, sqq.

[34] In II. i. 40, "sweet puck" is no more a proper name than "Hobgoblin";
so also in l. 148 of the same scene. In neither case should the name be
printed with a capital P.

[35] II. i. 34.

[36] V. i. 418, 421.

[37] Wright, _English Dialect Dictionary_, s.v. Puck, gives Scotland,
Ireland, Derby, Worcester, Shropshire, Gloucester, Sussex and Hampshire as
localities where the name is recorded.

[38] Text H in Child's _Ballads_, I. 352.

[39] Campbell's _Popular Tales of the West Highlands_ (1890), vol. ii,
tales xxv, xxvi, etc.

[40] _Ballads_, I. 314, and note.

[41] _M.N.D._, II. i. 40. (See note on p. 37.)

[42] _The Wyf of Bathe's Tale_, at the beginning; and elsewhere.

[43] _The Faerie Queene,_ chiefly in Book II, where in Canto X, stanzas
70-76, he gives a fictitious list of the generations of fairies; the first
"Elfe" was the image made by Prometheus, to animate which he stole fire
from heaven; the list ends with Oberon, and Tanaquil the Faerie Queen.

[44] Reprinted in this book, pp. 81-121.

[45] Mr. Chambers, in his edition of the play, Appendix A, Sec. l8, gives (i)
_Tarlton's News out of Purgatory_ (1590) (see p. 63), (ii) Churchyard's
_Handfull of Gladsome Verses_ (1592) (see p. 141), (iii) Nashe's _Terrors
of the Night_ (1594).

[46] The word _folk-lore_ has only been in existence sixty years, and the
science is very little older; it was vaguely referred to as "popular
antiquities" before that time.

[47] Alfred Nutt, _The Fairy Mythology of Shakespeare_ (1900), p. 24. This
little book is instructive and valuable.

[48] Nashe's Works, ed. R.B. McKerrow, i. 347.

[49] Gower, however, does so, as early as the fourteenth century;
_Confessio Amantis_, ii. 371.

[50] The opening of the beautiful _Helgi and Sigrun Lay_ as translated by
Vigfusson and York Powell in _Corpus Poeticum Boreale_ (1883), i. 131; see
also the editors' Introduction, i. lxi, lxiv.

[51] _Danish History_, iii. 70, 77; vi. 181; cf. O. Elton's translation
(1894), pp. 84, 93, 223, and York Powell's introduction thereto, lxiv.

[52] "It is worth noting that the Romance of Olger the Dane contains
several late echoes of the old Helgi myth. _a._ The visit of the fairies by
night to the new-born child ... _e._ His return to earth after death or
disappearance ... Mark that Holgi is the true old form ... The old hero
Holgi and the Carling peer Otgeir (Eadgar) are distinct persons confused by
later tradition."--_Corpus Poeticum Boreale_, i. cxxx.

"The _Fates_ ... bestow endowments on the new-born child, as in the
beautiful Helge Lay ... a point of the story which survives in the Ogier of
the Chansons de Geste, wherein Eadgar (Otkerus or Otgerus) gets what
belonged to Holger (Holge), the Helga til of Beowulf's Lay."--Saxo, _Danish
History_, lxiv.

[53] Cf. Child's _Ballads_, i. 319.

[54] In _Huon of Bordeaux_ Merlin comes with King Arthur to Oberon's
death-bed; Arthur introduces him as his nephew, the son of Ogier the Dane
and "my sister Morgan."

[55] The mere mention of these subterranean explorations opens up an
immense field of discussion and speculation that can here be only relegated
to a note; we can treat at greater length none but those legends which bear
directly on our subject. Odysseus visited Hades, Aeneas descended to Orcus
or Tartarus, and they have their counterparts in every land and every
mythology. Human aetiological tendencies supply explanations of any cavern
or natural chasm--even a volcano must be the mouth of the entrance to hell
or purgatory--from Taenarus, where Pluto carried off Proserpine, and the
Sibyl's cavern, whence Aeneas sought the lower regions, to the famous Lough
Dearg in Donegal, the entrance to "St. Patrick's Purgatory," and the Peak
cavern in Derbyshire. The student may begin his researches with T. Wright's
_St. Patrick's Purgatory_ (1844). A very common tale in Celtic literature
is that of the visit of some hero to the underworld and his seizure of some
gift of civilisation--just as Prometheus stole fire from heaven.

[56] _Ballads_, loc. cit.

[57] A version of Fytte I will be found in this book, pp. 122-132.

[58] See Child's _Ballads_, No. 37, Thomas Rymer, i. 317-329; also the
romance, _Thomas of Erceldoune_ (E.E.T.S., 1875), where Prof. J.A.H. Murray
prints all texts parallel, and adds a valuable introduction.

[59] A similar episode survives in a Breton folk-tale, cited by Professor
Kittredge in Child's _Ballads_, iii. 504. In _Huon of Bordeaux_ (E.E.T.S.
edition, p. 265), Charlemagne mistakes Oberon for God.

[60] See Gummere, _The Popular Ballad_ (1907), pp. 66-7.

[61] Cottonian, Caligula A. II. A later version is at the Bodleian, MS.
Rawlinson C. 86, and a Scottish version in Cambridge University Library,
MS. Kk. 5. 30.

[62] It was licensed to John Kynge the printer between 19 July 1557 and 9
July 1558. See Arber, Stationers' Registers, i. 79. Two fragments are in
the Bodleian; see Hales and Furnivall, _Bishop Percy's Folio Manuscript_
(1867), i. 521-535.

[63] In this year it is mentioned, as having been amongst Captain Cox's
books, in Laneham's famous _Letter_. See _Shakespeare Library_ reprint, p.
xxx.

[64] Brit. Mus. MS. Addl. 27,879; see Hales and Furnivall, _Bishop Percy's
Folio Manuscript_, i. 142.

[65] Harl. 3810 (British Museum), printed by Ritson in _Ancient English
Metrical Romances_ (1802) ii. 248; the Auchinleck MS. (W. 4. 1, in the
Advocates' Library, Edinburgh), printed by D. Laing in _Ancient Popular
Poetry of Scotland_, iii; and Ashmolean 61 (Bodleian Library, Oxford),
printed by Halliwell in his _Fairy Mythology_, p. 36. The three are
collated by O. Zielke, _Sir Orfeo_ (Breslau 1880), a fully annotated
edition. The last is used here.

[66] A grafted fruit tree; here probably an apple.

[67] It may be seen in Child's _Ballads_, i. 215, with a full analysis of
the romance, and in the present editor's _Popular Ballads of the Olden
Time_, Second Series, p. 208.

[68] _Ballads_, i. 338-340; see also various "Additions and Corrections" in
the later volumes, and s.v. _Elf_, _Elves_, etc. in the _Index of Matters
and Literature_.

[69] _Morte Darthur_ (ed. Sommer), vi. l. 3.

[70] See below, p. 131.

[71] See J.M. Synge, _The Aran Islands_ (1907), p. 48, and A. Nutt, _Fairy
Mythology of Shakespeare_, p. 22.

[72] See Synge, _op. cit._, p. 47.

[73] See his admirable article on _Sir Orfeo_ in the _American Journal of
Philology_, vii. 176-202. _The Courtship of Etain_ may be seen in English,
translated from the two versions in Egerton MS. 1782. and the "Leabhar na
h-Uidhri"--an eleventh century Irish MS.--in _Heroic Romances of Ireland_,
by A. H, Leahy, i. 7-32.

[74] A. Nutt, _Fairy Mythology of Shakespeare_, p. 12.

[75] _Wyf of Bathe's Tale_, 1-6.

[76] See A. Nutt, _op. cit._, pp. 16-17; and various authorities given by
G.L. Kittredge, _op. cit._, p. 196 notes.

[77] Pronounced _shee_.

[78] Mr. Alfred Nutt (_op. cit._, pp. 19-23) is at pains to show the close
association of the _Tuatha De Danann_ with ritual of an
agricultural-sacrificial kind, in the aspect they have
assumed--"fairies"--to the modern Irish peasant. The Sidhe have fallen from
the high estate of the romantic and courtly wooers and warriors, as they
must once have fallen from the Celtic pantheon.

[79] Chap, xxv. (E.E.T.S. edition, 72). Oberon recites his history again in
chap. lxxxiv. (p. 264).

[80] Chap. xxii. (E.E.T.S. edition, p. 65, sqq.).

[81] Cf. Child's _Ballads_, Nos. 2 (_The Elfin Knight_), 4 (_Lady Isabel
and the Elf-Knight_), 41 (_Hina Etin_), and perhaps 35 (_Allison Gross_),
with his note on the last, l. 314, referring to No. 36 (_The Laily Worm and
the Machrel of the Sea_).

[82] See above, p. 51.

[83] See p. 124, l. 39.

[84] _Tarlton's News out of Purgatory, published by Robin Goodfellow_
(1590), Shakespeare Society reprint, p. 55.

[85] See above, p. 41.

[86] See the extracts from Scot's _Discovery of Witchcraft_ and the _Robin
Goodfellow_ tract, pp. 133-140 and 81-121.

[87] Romeo and Juliet, I. iv. 33-94. See above, p. 37.

[88] Had I been able to find a book, _Veridica relatio de daemonio Puck_,
referred to in the article _Diable_ in the _Dictionnaire des Sciences
Occultes_ (in Migne, tome 48, vol. i., p. 475), it might be that it would
prove of great interest. In any case this allusion (pointed out to me by
Mr. R.B. McKerrow) is an early instance of Puck used as a proper name.

[89] Abbreviated from E.K. Chambers' full analysis with references,
_Warwick Shakespeare_ edition of _M.N.D._ pp. 142-4.

[90] See II. i. 155.

[91] How far Shakespeare associated his fairy queen Titania with her
nominal parent Diana, is a question that would make matter for an elaborate
study in mythology and mysticism, and might yet lead to no result. Diana is
Luna in the heavens; Lucina (the goddess of child-birth) and the Huntress
on earth; and Hecate in the underworld, goddess of enchantments and
nocturnal incantations, often also identified with Proserpina. Titania is a
votaress of the moon; we have seen that fairies are intimately concerned
with mortal babies, and that there is a fairy-hunt (see the quotation from
James I's _Demonology_, p. 37 above); and we have also noted the confusion
of Proserpina with the fairy-queen.--The _Tuatha De Danann_ are said to be
"the folk of _Danu_"--who is Danu? Hecate was called Trivia, on account of
the above tripartition of Diana; her statues were set up where three roads
met, and the fairy-queen in _Thomas the Rhymer_ points out to him the three
roads that lead to heaven, hell, and elf-land. Speculation is easily led
astray.

[92] J.M. Synge, _Aran Islands_, p. 10.

[93] The metamorphosis of Hyacinthus, for instance, Bk. X, 162, sqq.;
although there are others in the same book. See also the alteration in the
mulberry caused by Pyramus' blood (pp. 77-80).

* * * * *

ILLUSTRATIVE TEXTS

TEXTS


THE LEGEND OF PYRAMUS AND THISBE 73

ROBIN GOOD-FELLOW 81

THOMAS OF ERCELDOUNE 122

SCOT'S DISCOVERY OF WITCHCRAFT 133

'STRANGE FARLIES' 141

THE MAD MERRY PRANKS OF ROBIN 144

QUEEN MAB 149

THE FAIRIES' FAREWELL 151

THE FAIRY QUEEN 155

NYMPHIDIA 158

* * * * *

THE LEGEND OF PYRAMUS AND THISBE

From Arthur Golding's translation of Ovid's _Metamorphoses_ (1575), Book
IV, ff. 52-3.

Within the town (of whose huge walls so monstrous high and thick,
The fame is given Semiramis for making them of brick)
Dwelt hard together two young folk, in houses joined so near,
That under all one roof well nigh both twain conveyed were.
The name of him was Pyramus, and Thisbe call'd was she,
So fair a man in all the East was none alive as he.
Nor ne'er a woman, maid, nor wife in beauty like to her.
This neighbourhood bred acquaintance first, this neighbourhood first did
stir
The secret sparks: this neighbourhood first an entrance in did show
For love, to come to that to which it afterward did grow.
And if that right had taken place they had been man and wife,
But still their parents went about to let[1] which (for their life)
They could not let. For both their hearts with equal flame did burn.
No man was privy to their thoughts. And for to serve their turn,
Instead of talk they used signs: the closelier they suppressed
The fire of love, the fiercer still it raged in their breast.
The wall that parted house from house had riven therein a cranny,
Which shrunk at making of the wall: this fault not marked of any
Of many hundred years before (what doth not love espy?)
These lovers first of all found out, and made a way whereby
To talk together secretly, and through the same did go
Their loving whisp'rings very light and safely to and fro.
Now as at one side Pyramus, and Thisbe on the tother
Stood often drawing one of them the pleasant breath from other:
O spiteful wall (said they) why dost thou part us lovers thus?
What matter were it if that thou permitted both of us
In arms each other to embrace? or if thou think that this
Were over-much, yet mightest thou at least make room to kiss.
And yet thou shalt not find us churls: we think ourselves in debt
For the same piece of courtesy, in vouching safe[2] to let
Our sayings to our friendly ears thus freely come and go.
Thus having where they stood in vain complained of their woe,
When night drew near they bade adieu, and each gave kisses sweet
Unto the parget[3] on their side the which did never meet.
Next morning with her cheerful light had driven the stars aside,
And Phoebus with his burning beams the dewy grass had dried,
These lovers at their wonted place by fore-appointment met,
Where after much complaint and moan they covenanted to get
Away from such as watched them, and in the evening late
To steal out of their fathers' house and eke the city gate.
And to th' intent that in the fields they strayed not up and down,
They did agree at Ninus' tomb to meet without the town,
And tarry underneath a tree that by the same did grow;
Which was a fair high mulberry with fruit as white as snow,
Hard by a cool and trickling spring. This bargain pleased them both,
And so daylight (which to their thought away but slowly go'th)
Did in the Ocean fall to rest, and night from thence doth rise.
As soon as darkness once was come, straight Thisbe did devise
A shift to wind her out of doors, that none that were within
Perceived her; and muffling her with clothes about her chin,
That no man might discern her face, to Ninus' tomb she came
Unto the tree, and set her down there underneath the same.
Love made her bold. But see the chance, there comes besmeared with blood
About the chaps, a lioness all foaming from the wood,
From slaughter lately made of kine to staunch her bloody thirst
With water of the foresaid spring. Whom Thisbe, spying first
Afar by moonlight, thereupon with fearful steps gan fly
And in a dark and irksome cave did hide herself thereby.
And as she fled away for haste she let her mantle fall,
The which for fear she left behind not looking back at all.
Now when the cruel lioness her thirst had staunched well,
In going to the wood she found the slender weed that fell
From Thisbe, which with bloody teeth in pieces she did tear.
The night was somewhat further spent ere Pyramus came there.
Who seeing in this subtle sand the print of lion's paw,
Waxed pale for fear. But when that he the bloody mantle saw
All rent and torn; one night (he said) shall lovers two confound,
Of which long life deserved she of all that live on ground.
My soul deserves of this mischance the peril for to bear.
I, wretch, have been the death of thee, which to this place of fear
Did cause thee in the night to come, and came not here before.
My wicked limbs and wretched guts with cruel teeth therefore
Devour ye, O ye lions all that in this rock do dwell.
But cowards use to wish for death. The slender weed that fell
From Thisbe up he takes, and straight doth bear it to the tree,
Which was appointed erst the place of meeting for to be.
And when he had bewept and kissed the garment which he knew,
Receive thou my blood too (quoth he), and therewithal he drew
His sword, the which among his guts he thrust, and by and by
Did draw it from the bleeding wound, beginning for to die,
And cast himself upon his back. The blood did spin on high
As when a conduit pipe is cracked, the water bursting out
Doth shoot itself a great way off, and pierce the air about.
The leaves that were upon the tree besprinkled with his blood
Were dyed black. The root also, bestained as it stood
A deep dark purple colour, straight upon the berries cast,
Anon scarce ridded of her fear with which she was aghast,
For doubt of disappointing him comes Thisbe forth in haste,
And for her lover looks about, rejoicing for to tell
How hardly she had 'scaped that night the danger that befell.
And as she knew right well the place and fashion of the tree
(As which she saw so late before) even so when she did see
The colour of the berries turned, she was uncertain whether
It were the tree at which they both agreed to meet together.
While in this doubtful stound[4] she stood, she cast her eye aside,
And there beweltered in his blood her lover she espied
Lie sprawling with his dying limbs; at which she started back,
And looked pale as any box; a shuddering through her strack,
Even like the sea which suddenly with whissing noise doth move,
When with a little blast of wind it is but touched above.
But when approaching nearer him she knew it was her love,
She beat her breast, she shrieked out, she tare her golden hairs,
And taking him between her arms did wash his wounds with tears;
She meint[5] her weeping with his blood, and kissing all his face
(Which now became as cold as ice) she cried in woeful case:
Alas! what chance, my Pyramus hath parted thee and me?
Make answer, O my Pyramus: it is thy Thisbe, even she
Whom thou dost love most heartily that speaketh unto thee:
Give ear and raise thy heavy head. He, hearing Thisbe's name,
Lift up his dying eyes, and, having seen her, closed the same.
But when she knew her mantle there, and saw his scabbard lie
Without the sword: Unhappy man, thy love had made thee die;
Thy love (she said) hath made thee slay thyself. This hand of mine
Is strong enough to do the like. My love no less than thine
Shall give me force to work my wound. I will pursue thee dead,
And, wretched woman as I am, it shall of me be said,
That like as of thy death I was the only cause and blame,
So am I thy companion eke and partner in the same.
For death which only could, alas! asunder part us twain,
Shall never so dissever us but we will meet again.
And you the parents of us both, most wretched folk alive,
Let this request that I shall make in both our names belyve[6]
Entreat you to permit that we, whom chaste and steadfast love,
And whom even death hath joined in one, may, as it doth behove,
In one grave be together laid. And thou unhappy tree,
Which shroudest now the corse of one, and shalt anon through me
Shroud two, of this same slaughter hold the sicker[7] signs for ay
Black be the colour of thy fruit and mourning-like alway,
Such as the murder of us twain may evermore bewray.
This said, she took the sword, yet warm with slaughter of her love,
And setting it beneath her breast did to the heart it shove.
Her prayer with the gods and with their parents took effect,
For when the fruit is throughly ripe, the berry is bespect[8]
With colour tending to a black. And that which after fire
Remained, rested in one tomb as Thisbe did desire.

* * * * *

ROBIN GOOD-FELLOW; HIS MAD PRANKS AND MERRY JESTS

Not omitting that ancient form of beginning tales, _Once upon a time_ it
was my chance to travel into that noble county of Kent. The weather being
wet, and my two-legged horse being almost tired (for indeed my own legs
were all the supporters that my body had), I went dropping into an
alehouse; there found I, first a kind welcome, next good liquor, then kind
strangers (which made good company), then an honest host, whose love to
good liquor was written in red characters both in his nose, cheeks and
forehead: an hostess I found there too, a woman of very good carriage; and
though she had not so much colour (for what she had done) as her rich
husband had, yet all beholders might perceive by the roundness of her
belly, that she was able to draw a pot dry at a draught, and ne'er unlace
for the matter.

Well, to the fire I went, where I dried my outside and wet my inside. The
ale being good, and I in good company, I lapt in so much of this nappy
liquor, that it begot in me a boldness to talk, and desire of them to know
what was the reason that the people of that country were called
Long-tails[1]. The host said, all the reason that ever he could hear was,
because the people of that country formerly did use to go in side-skirted
coats. "There is," said an old man that sat by, "another reason that I have
heard: that is this. In the time of the Saxons' conquest of England there
were divers of our countrymen slain by treachery, which made those that
survived more careful in dealing with their enemies, as you shall hear.

"After many overthrows that our countrymen had received by the Saxons, they
dispersed themselves into divers companies into the woods, and so did much
damage by their sudden assaults to the Saxons, that Hengist, their king,
hearing the damage that they did (and not knowing how to subdue them by
force), used this policy. He sent to a company of them, and gave them his
word for their liberty and safe return, if they would come unarmed and
speak with him. This they seemed to grant unto, but for their more security
(knowing how little he esteemed oaths or promises) they went every one of
them armed with a short sword, hanging just behind under their garments, so
that the Saxons thought not of any weapons they had: but it proved
otherwise; for when Hengist his men (that were placed to cut them off) fell
all upon them, they found such unlooked a resistance, that most of the
Saxons were slain, and they that escaped, wondering how they could do that
hurt, having no weapons (as they saw), reported that they struck down men
like lions with their tails; and so they ever after were called Kentish
Long-tails."

I told him this was strange, if true, and that their country's honour bound
them more to believe in this than it did me.

"Truly, sir," said my hostess, "I think we are called Long-tails, by reason
our tales are long, that we used to pass the time withal, and make
ourselves merry." "Now, good hostess," said I, "let me entreat from you one
of those tales." "You shall," said she, "and that shall not be a common one
neither, for it is a long tale, a merry tale, and a sweet tale; and thus it
begins."

THE HOSTESS'S TALE OF THE BIRTH OF ROBIN GOOD-FELLOW

Once upon a time, a great while ago, when men did eat more and drink
less--then men were more honest, that knew no knavery, than some now are
that confess the knowledge and deny the practice--about that time
(whensoe'er it was) there was wont to walk many harmless spirits called
fairies, dancing in brave order in fairy rings on green hills with sweet
music (sometime invisible) in divers shapes: many mad pranks would they
play, as pinching of sluts black and blue, and misplacing things in
ill-ordered houses; but lovingly would they use wenches that cleanly were,
giving them silver and other pretty toys, which they would leave for them,
sometimes in their shoes, other times in their pockets, sometimes in bright
basins and other clean vessels.

Amongst these fairies was there a he-fairy; whether he was their king or no
I know not, but surely he had great government and command in that country,
as you shall hear. This same he-fairy did love a proper young wench, for
every night would he with other fairies come to the house, and there dance
in her chamber; and oftentimes she was forced to dance with him, and at his
departure would he leave her silver and jewels, to express his love unto
her. At last this maid was with child, and being asked who was the father
of it, she answered a man that nightly came to visit her, but early in the
morning he would go his way, whither she knew not, he went so suddenly.

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Tell us your literary dreams
Articles published by guardian.co.uk Books

John Crace digests A Question of Upbringing by Anthony Powell

My English teacher is wearing a barrister's wig. He turns and points towards me as I sit trembling in the dock. "Members of the jury, I put it to you that this man, Tom Robinson, is innocent," he says, rather lugubriously. I want to protest. I want to shout that no, I am not Tom Robinson, but yes, I am innocent! But the words won't come out.

Then I wake up. It's another literary dream – one that's troubled me ever since I studied Harper Lee's To Kill a Mockingbird for GCSE.

Most of the time I'm disappointed to leave my literary dreams, waking to realise that I'm not really ensconced with with the boozing Welsh pensioners from Kingsley Amis's The Old Devils or haven't really been thrashing Harry Potter's Quidditch team. I remember with fondness a skiing trip with William Shakespeare and the delightful discovery that Don DeLillo was serving drinks behind the bar in my local pub.

It's not all sunshine, though. Tom Wolfe once ruined a trip to New York, shouting at me across Fifth Avenue: "You're not even familiar with my work – get outta town, asshole!" But that's nothing on Howard Jacobson. I spent a summer discovering his novels during my waking hours and bumping into him in my sleep. I'd see him in a local restaurant and tell him how much I was enjoying his novels. "Oh right," he'd snap, "that old chestnut, huh?" When I met him for real last year he was, in fact, charm personified. I didn't tell him about the dreams.

But enough about my subconscious, what about yours? It's Friday: forget about work and tell me all about your literary dreams. Don't hold back – it's not like we'll read anything into it.

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